HUUMMMM....
YOU'RE PRETTY FOR A "BIG GIRL!"
By: Karicean Michelle

So it happens just like this, you’re having one of those serious talks with a really close friend who just happens to be of the opposite sex, and the forbidden sentence comes out…”I mean you’re like the perfect women, in my opinion, you’re smart, you’re funny, you’re sweet as can be, and you’re beautiful for a “Big Girl”.   SCREEEEEECH!!!!!   The words scratch along your ears like someone’s nails going down a chalkboard.  Mouth open and blinking repeatedly, your thoughts are, “Did he just say that too me? So does that make you kinda smart for an idiot?”  You quickly gather yourself, push down yet another insult and add it to the already overflowing insecurity pile and in that sweettone, respond, “Don’t worry, a good woman will come along soon. GULP!” Or how about this line, the dreaded  “HOOK UP” description, “Man she’s got a pretty face, the only thing is she’s sooooo skinny!” Or, “Yeah I like her she’s wonderful!  She has a great personality, she cute, but she’s just too dark for my taste” WHAT??!!!

It leaves one to wonder why those so-called compliments were made only to be immediately snatched away with disclaimers. So what is beautiful?  What size is it? How tall is it? How dark or light is it?  How old is it? Does it have a lot of money, and very few friends?  I’m willing to wager that the general population has gotten it wrong yet again. With all of the diverse beauty in this world it will never cease to amaze me that one thing has remained prevalent in our society, shallow thinking.

It sounds cliché I know, but this simple truth holds true, YOU have got to love YOU…Big Hips, Full Lips, the whole nine yards!   You have to see it as Dark and Lovely…Thick and Sexy, Lean and Luscious, whatever you are love it!  It’s really all in how you see it.  There is something undeniably striking about a woman who just knows her worth.  C’mon ladies, we all know her.  She’s that girl that walks in a room and interrupts conversations without even saying a word.  It’s how she walks, how she stands, her kindness to others. She takes care of herself, her matters are in order, she is flawless and she knows it.   She’s not rude, arrogant, or conceited, she is simply confident!

The only thing that stands between you and this type of emotional freedom is your opinion of yourself.  Let’s make up our minds to throw out the old thinking and habits that lead to that hung down head syndrome.  The opinion that you have of yourself is the most important one you can have so use it for your good.

Below are a couple of “Love You” tips to help you along the way.

- Stop rehearsing the physical traits you don’t like about yourself
- Change your confessions about yourself
- Get off the trivial stuff
- Forgive your offenders
- Remove yourself from negative, self-deprecating circles
- Accept compliments without giving a disclaimer
- Hang out with yourself
- No longer give your pearls to pigs

For too long we have identified beauty as one dressed in the latest fashion, sippin’ on named brand coffees, wearing big sunglasses, rockin’ a super large hand bag, and using superlatives like; “OMG!” and “You’re my BFF” Don’t get me wrong, these are all cute and fun things, but they don’t add or take away from what’s beautiful about you.

If you’re waiting on compliments from others before you consider validating yourself, you will be waiting a long time.  From today on validate yourself! Remember that you are the one who has the power to state your beauty.  Make it a point today to stop wasting your valuables on those who don’t deserve it.  The Bible recommends that we “cast not our pearls amongst swine” and I agree whole-heartedly.  What in the world do pigs need with pearls anyway?  This year invest some of that love you have to give in… yourself.